- You develop repetitive stress disorder from playing solitaire.
- You've actually figured out a way to get Gilligan off that island.
- People only come into your office to borrow pencils from your ceiling.
- To exercise your creative side, you knit a computer cozy.
- You create on ongoing e-mail dialog with your computer at home.
- No longer content with merely photocopying your butt, you now scan it and enhance it with Photoshop.
- After months of taking frequent breaks, you now require only a single can of cola to belch the names of all seven Dwarves.
- You discover that staring at your cubicle wall long enough produces images of Elvis.
- The 18-hole par 3 mini-golf course in your office.
- The 4th Division of Paperclips has overrun the Pushpin Infantry and General White-Out has called for a new skirmish.